Home Alone

“When was the last time
You loved somebody?

When was the last time
Your thoughts defied morals?

When was the last time
You could feel that lonely abode?

These are not the ones that age
With each passing year.

These are nothing but moments
That shall live with you!

For the Quaint eye can be controlled,
But the fickle heart is seldom chained…”

There comes a time in every man’s life when he starts feeling lonely even in the company of his best friends. A feeling begins to arise from within, screaming to him loud and clear, that he’s not giving his hundred percent in anything; he’s distracted while doing his every day chores and even if he were to take an adventure trip in the remotest corners of the planet, I am sure, these spasms of distraction would isolate him from the rest, if not forever at least momentarily.

These, I have come to believe, are nothing more than the search for that perfect someone. A search that can be fruitful, bringing bliss to his otherwise putrid life or just bury him in his own imaginations – a fate which is so unnerving to think of! I am certain that this would have been figured out by anyone undergoing such crippling feelings of detachment from the society.

The worst thing about this kind of life is the absence of any physical definition of the IDEAL one. It’s a weird guessing game where you might end up getting an answer but can never tell whether it’s the right solution. In fact, there might never be any RIGHT solution; it’s more of a person-to-person basis.

You can get something close to right, but there’s no telling how right that something is! You might feel a dent even after finding a partner; my outlook of everyday world, unfortunately, tells me that the scale is bound to tip in this side of the set-up for a vast majority; it’s someplace which I don’t want to be!

A lot of people loose patience in this game and end up doing the inevitable – giving up the search. Of course, not everyone is so unlucky; some do end up getting out of the maze. But that’s how the system operates – on sheer luck!

So how long does a man live with these feelings? When does it all begin? There’s no telling. The rules of the strange game (if at all there were any) are, in fact, even more bizarre! You can develop laws stating the right age for choosing a partner and even restrict the choice of a partner, but the human mind has always remained untamed and there’s no telling what thoughts passes a man’s mind in a mere fraction of a second. He could have lived a whole life, with a passer-by, in that blink of an eye!

I cannot warrant if the female of the species undergo similar feelings, for I’ve never been really close enough to any of those unfathomable creatures. I don’t even know if any of these rantings made any sense to anybody. But as far as I can see, living life, having such perilous thoughts, whilst living all alone (within), is nothing less than murdering your soul!